BRIDGET. Sound of knocking on door

No, it’s all right.

 

Sound of knocking on door

 

BRIDGET

Hector …

 

ANNIE

Hector …

 

BRIDGET

I’ve got something for you.

 

HECTOR

Oh, OK.

Come in.

 

BRIDGET

Spoil sport!

 

NICK

Hector!

Hector!

 

HECTOR

Hello.

 

NICK

Here are your clothes, you will look so cool.

 

HECTOR

Cool?

 

NICK

Co-ol.

 

HECTOR

Cool!

 

NICK

Nice melons!

 

BRIDGET

Melons?

Who are those from?

 

ANNIE

Ah, I think Hector has been shopping online.

Oh, I’m really thirsty, I need a drink.

 

BRIDGET

But we don’t need any melons!

 

ANNIE

Well he did try!

And he bought some eggs.

Yeah, just a few.

 

NICK [sending email]

‘Yo Dan!

Hector did the shopping today.’

Nice melons.

‘He bought one hundred and forty four eggs.’

 

ANNIE

Just a few.

 

NICK

‘And ten melons instead of ten lemons.’

What an idiot.

Ha!

 

HECTOR

I would like some eggs please.

I would like some lemons please.

And oh, dog food for my head!

Ha, ha, ha, thank you!

 

ANNIE [sending email]

‘I went shopping for Hector today and bought him something really cool!

I cannot wait for him to try it on.’

ANNIE

TRY IT ON.

 

BRIDGET [sending email]

‘I went to the clothes shop and bought Hector a really trendy outfit!

He will look just like David Beckham!’

 

BRIDGET

I’ve got something for you!

 

ANNIE

So how did Hector do the shopping?

Ah-ha!

Hector ordered ten melons instead of ten lemons.

Oh, an easy mistake, he did try.

 

BRIDGET

Yes, he did try.

 

NICK

And what about the eggs?

 

ANNIE

OK, eggs.

You buy a dozen eggs, yeah.

 

NICK

Yep, a dozen is ten.

 

BRIDGET

A dozen is twelve, stupid!

 

NICK

I know!

 

ANNIE

Well Hector has put the number twelve here.

 

NICK

Well that’s OK, that’s one box.

 

ANNIE

No, he ordered twelve boxes.

 

BRIDGET

One hundred and forty four.

 

ANNIE

Now, dog food.

 

NICK

Ha, ha, I can’t wait!

 

HECTOR

OK, I’m ready!

 

NICK

We’re ready!

 

BRIDGET

Enter!

 

HECTOR

Do you like it?

Well?

 

ANNIE

Ah [erm] I like the shirt.

 

BRIDGET

I like the sarong.

 

NICK

I like the shoes.

 

HECTOR

So, am I co-ol?

 

NICK, BRIDGET & ANNIE

[Erm].

 

HECTOR

No.

I’m not cool.

 

NICK, BRIDGET & ANNIE

[Erm] no.

 

HECTOR

So, I will go shopping.

 

NICK

Here we go again.

Hector! You can’t go out there on your own.

You went shopping on the Internet.

 

HECTOR

Yes.

 

NICK

Ha-ha!

You ordered melons instead of lemons and too many eggs.

Have you ever been to a supermarket?

 

HECTOR

No.

My …

 

NICK

Who are these?

 

HECTOR

My …

 

NICK

… Servants.

 

HECTOR

Yeah, my servants..

 

NICK

Servants.

Now I understand.

 

BRIDGET

Come on Hector, I will teach you how to shop, Hector …

 

ANNIE

‘Till you drop.

Bridget and I will be the shopkeepers.

 

BRIDGET

And you are our customer!

 

HECTOR

OK. [Clears throat]

Good afternoon.

 

BRIDGET

Good afternoon!

 

ANNIE

Can I help you sir?

 

HECTOR

Eh?

 

BRIDGET

What would you like to buy?

 

HECTOR

Oh, I would like some …

 

ANNIE

… Clothes!

 

HECTOR

Yes, I would like some clothes, please.