Образование, нужное всем и всегда
В наше время не так-то просто устроиться на хорошую работу. Но и у компаний-заказчиков существуют свои трудности: крайне мало профессионалов, особенно в областях продаж, переговоров и ситуаций, где необходимо разрешать конфликты.
Сегодня люди, только начинающие свое профессиональное обучение, и те, кто получает второе образование или меняет профессию, сталкиваются с одной и той же проблемой.
Предлагаемое образование дает очень хорошую теоретическую базу знаний, но в то же время почти полное отсутствие практических умений. Как известно, невозможно стать боксером, изучая бокс в теории, или же научиться танцевать, прочитав описание позиций. И то, и другое требует личного непосредственного участия, приобретения конкретных навыков, отработки до автоматизма технических приемов. Любая организация, приглашающая специалиста на работу, требует от него практического владения профессией, а не просто знаний.
Бизнес-консультант. Человек, получивший эту профессию, в совершенстве владеет знаниями и практическими умениями и способен решать задачи в таких областях, как менеджмент, психология рекламы, презентации и экспозициониро-вание, переговоры, продажи, самоменеджмент, организация бизнеса, деловой этикет, public relations и создание имиджа.
Где и кем могут работать те, кто получил профессию бизнес-консультанта?
Используя эту подготовку, люди могут достичь в своей карьере стремительного роста, занять пост руководителя любого уровня.
Легко организовать свой бизнес.
Работать в качестве менеджера по персоналу, имиджмейкера-психолога, менеджера по организации и проведению продаж, тренинг-менеджера, специалиста по разрешению конфликтов, пресс-секретаря и специалиста по производству и проведению рекламных кампаний.
Что дает приобретение этой профессии на личном уровне?
Способность негласно влиять на вышестоящее начальство и незаметно управлять окружающими, изменять их убеждения, ценности и морально-этические нормы.
Возможность самосовершенствования и сознательного развития интуиции, интеллекта и эрудиции.
Разрешать внутренние и внешние разногласия и проблемы.
Быстро перенимать способности, навыки, таланты, мастерство любых удачливых людей, которые достигли успеха в самых разных сферах жизни и видах деятельности.
Специфика этой профессии такова, что не каждый человек способен успешно работать в этих областях, поэтому желающие пройти обучение сначала участвуют в конкурсном отборе по результатам собеседования с психологом.
Обучение ведетсяна основе современных высокоэффективных методов, занятия проходят как в традиционной лекционной форме, так и в форме специализированных профессиональных тренингов.
Salesmanship; to settle conflicts; participation; to master professional skills; to succeed in one's career; to influence smb indirectly; to manage smb self-improvement; to solve internal and external problems; to adopt smb's skills; to meet competitions.
Assignment:
Render the texts in English. Use the words and phrases given below each text.
THINGS TO DO
A. Individual Work
1. Use the following proverbs in situations of your own. (Give Russian equivalents if possible.)
1) Knowledge is power.
2) Live and learn.
3)It's never late to learn.
4) There is no royal road to learning.
5) Learn to walk before you run.
6) Never do things by halves.
7) Experience is the teacher of fools.
8) Well begun is halfdone.
9) Where there's a will there's a way.
10) Zeal without knowledge is a runaway rose.
11) Jack of all trades is master of none.
12) To know everything is to know nothing.
13) A tree is known by its fruit.
14) Too many cooks spoil the broth.
15) Every oak must be an acorn.
16) Children should be seen and not heard.
17) Spare the rod and spoil the child.
18) Don't teach your grandmother to suck eggs.
2. Comment on the following quotations. (Say whether you agree or not and why.)
I)" It is only the ignorant who despise education." (Syrus)
2)"0nly the educated are free." (Epictetus)
3) "The secret of education lies in respecting the pupil." (Emerson)
4) "Self-conquest is the greatest of victories." (Plato)
5) "Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects." (W. Rogers)
6) "As for me, all I know is that I know nothing." (Socrates)
7) "Knowledge is like money, the more he gets, the mote he craves." (J. Billings)
8) "A little learning is dangerous thing." (A. Pope)
9) "When children are doing nothing, they are doing mischiefs." (H.Fielding)
10) "Let the child's first lesson be obedience, and the second will be what thou wilt (you will)." (B. Franklin)
11) "People seldom improve when they have no other model but themselves."
(0. Goldsmith)
12) "Men learn while they teach."
"Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labour does the body." (Seneca)
3. Speak on the "typical" kind of school in your country.
4. If you could be any age, what age would you be? Why?
5. Compare two of your teachers.
6. Compare education in your country with education in Great Britain/the USA.
7. Talk about your last year in school.
8. Do you (dis)agree that private schools are better than public schools?
9. Explain how to study for a test.
10. Here are some decisions that British students have to make:
at 16 – stay on at school? look for a job? apply for a place on a Youth Training Scheme? go to the Sixth Form College?
at 18 – go to university? get a job? start a training course? do voluntary work? travel and work abroad? move away from home?
Make a list of decisions that students have to make in your education system.
11. Number these reasons in their order of importance from I (most important reason) to 12 (least important reason).
to acquire general knowledge
to prepare for a job to meet other young people
to train one's memory
to learn something about subjects one will not deal with again
later
to find out what one is really interested in
to give one's parents some peace and quiet
to test one's intelligence
to learn how to study and work with books
to have a good time
to be kept dependent
to learn discipline and order
B. Pair Work
1. You want to quit school and start work, but your parents feel it is important to finish high school. Talk to them.
2. Your child has very good grades and wants to go to college. You feel that you cannot afford to send him/her. Tell your child this.
3. You want to stay in the US/Great Britain and study but your family wants you to return. Call them and ask them to permit you to stay.
4. Describe some of the teachers at this school to a student who is just beginning the programme.
5. Ask your partner what qualities he/she (dis)likes in a teacher.
6. Discuss with your partner how important you think a college education is nowadays.
7. You are at interview. You want to get into a very prestigious school. Explain to the Dean of Admissions why you think you should be accepted.
8. Ask your friend which he thinks is more practical – dropping out of school and getting a job or continuing at school and having very little money.
9. Ask the school receptionist for some information and a school entrance application.
10. Tell your teacher that you want to apply to a university in Great Britain/the USA and ask if he/she would write you a recommendation.
11. Even though your grades are not very good, you think you want to go to university. Talk to your school counsellor about the possibilities open to you.
12. You just took a very difficult exam. You feel the exam was unfair because there were several things on it that your class had not studied. Complain to the teacher.
13. Exchange opinions with your partners on the problems:
there should be no tests in school; children get a better education outside the classroom; parents should be stricter with their children.
14. Your student is constantly late and has been absentforseveral tests. Ask him/her to come into your office. Tell him/her to "shape up."
15. Imagine, your partner is a student at a London school. Interview him/her about a typical school day.
C. Group Work
1. Work in groups of 3–4. Imagine that you have to choose a place to study at 16. Make a list of possible educational establishments you'd like to enter. Now discuss your list with the other members of your group.
2. Read the text and do the assignments given below.
a) Imagine that you are one of the people chosen for the survey. What did you actually say?
Make your criticisms like this:
I wish I had had a better Maths teacher or I wish I hadn't wasted so much time at school.
Work through all the criticism and regrets in the same way.
b) Now link possible causes to these consequences. Complete the sentences in any way you like:
I would have got into university if ...
I might have passed my exams if ...
I could have gone to medical school if ...
I would have got a much better paid job if ...
c) Work in pairs. Ask your partner if he/she has any criticism or regrets about his past life, anything that he would or might have done differently in different circumstances.
Does a Good Education Really Matter?
We went along to Wandsworth Job Centre and surveyed some people to find out how important they felt that a good school education was.
The results showed that many people were disappointed in their education. They put the blame sometimes on themselves. Many felt that their teachers were not good enough, that many of the textbooks were out-of-date, especially when it came to science, and that they should have had more or better careers advice. They also felt that they should have been made to work harder, either by the teachers or by their parents. But people seemed equally ready to put the blame on their own shoulders. Many felt that they had chosen the wrong subjects when they started to specialize, or that they had wasted time at school. Others felt that they had left school too early in their eagerness to get a job and earn money. A few even thought that their failure was due to the type of school they went to, and that they would have been better off somewhere else.
D. Project Work
1. Collect as much information as possible about college and university education in your country. Organize a discussion which will touch upon the following questions:
Is college and university very expensive in your country?
Which college/university degrees are most common?
What opportunities are there for college graduates?
Is it difficult for young people to find a job?
2. Choose a university you are interested in. Pick up information about it in encyclopaedias and other reference books as the basis for your discussion.
3. Collect information about different types of secondary schools in your country. Great Britain/the USA and compare it. In your group decide:
which type of school is the best one and explain why you have chosen it;
which types of schools you consider out-of-date and why;
what your idea of a perfect school is.
4. Plan the perfect "core" college curriculum using the following information:
The trustees of your university are very upset by recent studies that show that the average graduate from your school is less competent than the average graduate of 50 years ago. As a result, the trustees have insisted that the entire educational approach be changed. Instead of having students take only elective courses, they must take three years (144 units) of "core" courses. Only during their senior year may they take electives in their major.
According to the trustees, the core courses must be designed to "give the student a broad background in the general humanities and sciences with the result that the student possesses analytical skills and written and verbal ability necessary to be a leader in society."
Each course is four units. You may require a person to take more than four units (or no units) in the following subjects:
5. Study the following chart and make a chart of the Russian/ British System of Education. Consult the reference material.
SUPPLEMENTARY READING
(by P.P. Dunne)
On Education
Mr Smith was worried. His little Bobbie was already six years old and it was time for the family to decide his career. It was difficult, however, to choose a suitable school for little Bobbie Smith. The boy was such a bright little chap. At last Mr Smith made up his mind to drop in* on Mr Brainer, his neighbour, and ask him for advice. Everybody in the neighbourhood believed Mr Brainer to be a very clever old gentleman.
"It's a serious question," Mr Brainer said, "and it seems to worry people more than it used to. Nowadays they start talking about the education of the child before they choose the name. It's like this: 'This kid talks in his sleep. He'll make a fine lawyer.' Or, 'Look at him fishing up in Uncle Tom's watch pocket. We must train him for a banker.' Or, 'I'm afraid he'll never be strong enough to work. He must go into the church.'
"To my mind, Smith, we are wasting too much time, thinking of the future of our young, and trying to teach them... what they ought not to know** till they are grown-up. We send the children to school as if it was a summer garden*** where they got to be amused instead of a reformatory**** where they are sent to be reformed. When I was a kid I was put at my ABC the first day I set foot in the school; and my head was sore inside and out***** before I went home. Nowadays things seem to be quite different. Now the first thing we teach the future businessmen and politicians of our nation is waltzing, singing and cutting pictures out of a book. In my opinion it would be much better to teach them toughness******, that's what they need in life."
_____________________
* to drop in on – to go to a person's house for a short visit
** what they ought not to know – чего они не должны знать
*** a summer garden – sort of kindergarten
**** a reformatory – исправительное заведение для малолетних преступников
***** my head was sore inside and out – у меня просто разламывалась голова
****** toughness – жесткость; упорство
The Kindergarten
"I know what will happen," Mr Brainer wenton to say. "You'll send Bobbie to what Germans call a Kindergarten. And it's a good thing for Germany, because all a German knows is what one tells him; and his graduation papers are a certificate that he needn't think any more. But we have introduced it into this country, and one day I dropped in on Mary Ellen and saw her Kindergarten. The children were sitting around on the floor and some were molding dogs out of mud and wiping their hands on their hair, and some were carving figures of a goat out of pasteboard, and some were singing, and some were sleeping and a few were dancing. And one boy was pulling another boy's hair.
'Why don't you punish the little savage, Mary Ellen?' said I.
'We don't believe in corporal punishment,'* said she. 'School should be pleasant for the children,' she said. 'The child whose hair is being pulled is learning patience, and the child that is pulling the hair is discovering the futility of human endeavour.'**
'Oh, well,' I said, 'that's very interesting, indeed. Times have certainly changed since I was a boy,' I said. 'Put them through their exercises,' I said, 'Tommy, spell "cat," I said.
'Go to the devil,' said the little angel.
'Very smartly said***," said Mary Ellen. 'You should not ask him to spell,' she said. 'They don't learn that till they go to college,' she said, 'sometimes not even then,' she said.
'And what do they learn?' I said.
'Playing,' she said, 'and dancing, and independence of speech, and beauty songs, and sweet thoughts, and how to make home homelike,' she said.
'I won't put them through any exercise today,' I said.
'...whisper, Mary Ellen,' I said. 'Do you never feel like whipping them?'****
'The teachings of Freebull and Pitzotly***** are contrary to that,' she said. 'But I'm going to be married and leave school on Friday the 22nd of January and on Thursday the 21st I'm going to ask a few of the darlings to the house and stew them over a slow fire.'"******
_____________________
* corporal punishment – телесные наказания
** the futility of human endeavour – тщетность человеческих усилий
*** very smartly said – очень умный ответ
**** Do you never feel like whipping them? –И вам никогда не хочетсяотшлепать их?
***** искаженное от Froebel – немецкий педагог,основатель детскихсадов, Pestallozi – выдающийся швейцарский педагог
****** to stew over a slow fire – зажарить на медленном огне
College
"Well, after they have learned at school they are ready for college. Mamma packs a few things into her son's bag and the lad trots off to college. If he is not strong enough to look for high honours as a boxer he goes into the thought department.* The President**takes him to his study, gives him a cigarette and says: 'My dear boy, what special branch of learning would you like to study to become one of our professors? We have a Chair of Beauty and a Chair of Puns, a Chair of Poetry on the Setting Sun, and one on Platonic Love, and one on Sweet Thoughts and one on How Green Grows the Grass.*** This is all you will need to equip you for perfect life, unless you intend being a dentist; in which case,'****he says, 'we won't think much of you but we have a good school where you can learn that disgraceful trade,' he says.
And the lad makes his choice, and every morning when he is up in time he takes a glass of whiskey and goes off to hear Professor Marianna tell him that if the data of human knowledge must be rejected as subjective, how much more must they be subjected as rejective..."*****
"I don't understand a word of what you are saying," said Mr Smith.
"Nor do I," said Mr Brainer. "But believe me it is as my father used to say: 'Children shouldn't be sent to school to learn but to learn how to learn. I don't care what you teach them, so long as it is unpleasant to them.' It's training they need, Smith. That's all. I never could make use of what I learned in college about trigonometry and grammar; and the bumps I got on my head from the schoolmaster's cane I have never been able to make use of either. But it was the being there and having to learn things by heart, without asking the meaning of them, and going to school cold and coming home hungry, that made the man of me you see before you. Our children must be taught toughness, that's what they need in life."
_________________________
* the thought department– (зд.)философский факультет
** the President – the Head of the College
*** Перечисляются вымышленные названия кафедр.
**** in which case– в таком случае
***** Дается сатирическая иллюстрация высокопарного псевдонаучного стиля философского факультета.
The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie*
(by Muriel Spark)
The boys, as they talked to the girls from Marcia Blaine School, stood on the far side of their bicycles holding the handlebars, which established a protective fence of bicycle between the sexes, and the impression that at any moment the boys were likely to be away.
The girls could not take off their panama hats because this was not far from the school gates and hatlessness was an offence. These girls formed the Brodie set.**That was what they had been called even before the headmistress had given them the name, when they had moved from the Junior to the Senior school at the age of twelve. At that time they had been immediately recognizable as Miss Brodie's pupils, being vastly informed on a lot of subjects irrelevant to the authorized curriculum, as the headmistress said, and useless to the school as a school. These girls were discovered to have heard of Mussolini, the Italian Renaissance painters; the interior decoration of the London house of the authorof"Winnie-the-Pooh" had been described to them, as had the love lives of Charlotte Bronte and of Miss Brodie herself. They were aware of the existence of Einstein and the arguments or those who considered the Bible to be untrue. They knew the rudiments of astrology but not the capital of Finland. All of the Brodie set, save one, counted on its fingers, as had Miss Brodie, with accurate results more or less.
By the time they were sixteen, and had reached the fourth form, they remained unmistakably Brodie, and were all famous in the school, which is to say they were held in suspicion and not much liking.*** They had no team spirit and very little in common with each other outside their continuing friendship with Jean Brodie. She still taught in the Junior department.
______________________
* Мисс Джин Бродив расцветет или энергии.
** the Brodie set – окружение Мисс Броди
*** they were held in suspicion and not much liking – к ним относились с недоверием и недолюбливали
Miss Brodie never discussed her affairs with the other members of the staff, but only with those former pupils whom she had trained up to her confidence. There had been previous plots to remove her from Blaine, which had been foiled.
"It has been suggested again that I should apply for a post at one of the progressive schools, where my methods would be more suited to the system than they are at Blaine. But I shall not apply for a post at a crank school.* I shall remain at this education factory. Give me a girl at an impressionable age, and she is mine for life."
Often, that sunny autumn, when the weather permitted, the small girls took their lessons seated on three benches arranged about the elm.
"Hold up your books," said Miss Brodie quite often that autumn, "prop them up in your hands, in case of intruders.**If there are any intruders, we are doing our history lesson... our poetry... English grammar."
The small girls held up their books with their eyes not on them, but on Miss Brodie.
"Meantime I will tell you about my last summer holiday in Egypt... I will tell you about care of the skin, and of the hands... about the Frenchman I met in the train to Biarritz... and I must tell you about the Italian paintings I saw. Who is the greatest Italian painter?"
"Leonardo da Vinci, Miss Brodie."
"That is incorrect. The answer is Giotto, he is my favourite."
"If anyone comes along," said Miss Brodie, "in the course of the following lesson, remember that it is the hour for English grammar. Meantime I will tell you a little of my life when I was younger than I am now, though six years older than the man himself."
"I was engaged to a young man at the beginning of the War but he fell on Flanders' Field," said Miss Brodie. "He fell like an autumn leaf though he was only twenty-two years of age. When we go indoors we shall look on the map at Flanders, and the spot where my lover was laid before you were born. He was poor. He came from Ayrshire, a countryman, but a hard-working and clever scholar. He said, when he asked me to marry him, 'We shall have to drink water and walk slow'! That was Hugh's country way of expressing that we would live quietly. We shall drink water and walk slow. What does the saying signify. Rose?"
"That you would live quietly. Miss Brodie," said Rose Stanley who six years later had a great reputation for sex.
The story of Miss Brodie's felled fiance was well on its way when the headmistress, Miss Mackay, was seen to approach across the lawn. Rose Stanley had now begun to weep.
______________________
* a crank school – школа с причудами (речь идет о современных школах)
** in caseof intruders–если кто-нибудь придет
"What are you little girls crying for?" asked Miss Mackay.
"They are moved by a story I have been telling them. We are having a history lesson," said Miss Brodie, catching a falling leaf in her hand as she spoke.
"Crying over a story at ten years of age!" said Miss Mackay to the girls. "I am only come to see you and I must be off. Well, girls, the new term has begun. I hope you all had a splendid summer holiday and I'd like to see your essays on how you spent them. You shouldn't be crying over history at the age often. My word!"
"You did well," said Miss Brodie to the class, when Miss Mackay 'had gone, "not to answer the question put to you. It is well, when in difficulties, to say never of word, neither black nor white. Speech is silver but silence is golden."
Assignments:
1. Give the Russian proverb corresponding to the English one given at the end of the extract.
2. Give the character sketch of Miss Brodie.
In One Ear and Upside Down*
The instructions and commands given by parents are endless in variety. Therefore it is impossible to make a list of them. Neither can you foretell exactly how they will be misinterpreted.
Yet, as a help to inexperienced parents I shall be happy to supply them with a short list of mixed-up instructions. They are sure to find it very helpful.
1. Instruction:"Clean up properly before you come to table. And don't use those guest towels!"
Result:The child goes and wipes its hands on a guest towel.
2. Instruction:"Will you kindly turn that radio down lower?"
Result:Usually none. After the words are repeated several times the child may turn off the radio and turn on the television.
3. Instruction:"Bring me the duster, please. I want to remove the dust from the piano."
Result:The child walks out of the room and returns in some time either with the vacuum cleaner or with a pail of water.
4. Instruction:"Clear the things off the dining room table and then get down to your homework so that you can finish it in time. I'll do the dishes."**
Result:The youngster clears the table after the request is repeated twice. Then he starts to do the dishes. He is greatly surprised when Mother tells him to start studying. He begins to complain that Mother is always telling him one thing and then changing her mind.
5. Instruction:"There is going to be trouble if you go on leaving the front door open every time you go in and out of the house."
Result:The child obviously alarmed quickly goes to the door and opens it.
6. Instruction:"Don't forget you have a dentist's appointment at three o'clock on the fourth."
Result:After reading the preceding examples, the reader is expected to figure this out for himself.*
I suppose there is no need to go on with list. A smart parent will now see a way out. As the child's natural tendency is to get a request mixed up, you simply first mix it up yourself.
For instance the other morning we wanted John to wash his neck, but we hesitated a long time before we finally worded the command. It was as follows: "Scrub the soap with a towelandthen hang up your neck."**
Result: The cleanest neck we have seen in six months. You see how simple it is if you know how to do it.
Assignments:
1. Think of a continuation to this sketch.
2. Tell a funny story about your little brother or sister, or your own child.
__________________________
* Обыгрывается поговорка"In one ear and out of the other."
** to do the dishes – мыть посуду
*** The mixed up instruction for: "Scrub your neck with the soap and then hang up your towel."
**** at least so far as children are concerned –покрайнеймере,чтокасаетсядетей
What's Wrong with the Kid?
(by Parke Cumming)
Recently a well-known psychiatrist stated that modern psychiatry has made us change our opinions of what must be regarded as normal behaviour.
He may be absolutely right, for all I know. I am not going to argue with him anyhow. I should like, however, to point out that the best way to get an idea of normal behaviour (at least so far as children are concerned*) is to get married and raise** a few. As I look back on my bachelor days, I'm surprised at the wrong views I held on the matter.
________________________
* to figure smth out for oneself– представитьчто-л.
Well, the best way to make myself clear, Ithink, is to take a few examples.
Example 1.A young boy in his early teens*** works for his neighbour, cleaning out the cellar, fetching wood, mowing the lawn and running errands in order to earn the money for a new tennis racket. Finally he gets the hard-earned money and buys a tennis racket.
Result:
Abnormal behaviour(i.e. the behaviour expected by an unmarried person or inexperienced parent): the boy practices regularly, and in some time becomes accomplished tennis player.
Normal behaviour,two days after buying the tennis racket, he removes all the strings and converts them into a line for a "Telephone" system. A short time later, the frame of the racket is converted into a giant slingshot.****
Example 2.A small girl – let us say aged three – is presented with a new pail and shovel for her sand box.
Abnormal behaviour,the child takes the toys to the sand box and plays with them day after day.
Normal behaviour,the child plays with the toys for ten minutes after which she throws them into a dustbin. She then makes several trips to the house and starts making sand pies with the following tools: one silver spoon, her father's best crystal cocktail shaker, her mother's favourite roasting pan.
Example 3.A five-year-old child shows interest in the neighbour's police dog, an animal the size of a mountain lion and with much sharper teeth. His parents seeing his interest in dogs, buy him the cutest little two-month-old spaniel puppy you ever saw.
Abnormal behaviour,the child is crazy about the new pet.
Normal behaviour,the child is crazy with terror as seeing the puppy and attempts to run next door to the police dog for protection.
Example 4.Six year-old Effie raises bell***** when her mother doesn't invite Susie Connors to her birthday party, and continues to do so until the mother finally yields.
Abnormal behaviour.Effie greets Susie affectionately when she appears.
Normal behaviour.Effie attacks Susie furiously, scratches her face and pulls her hair until Susie's mother caring away the screaming child.
Example 5.By means of hard work and considerable skill a 10-year-old boy succeeds in making an excellent pair of skis, but then he has to wait three weeks until there is snow.
Abnormal behaviour,the boy is crazy with joy, rushes outdoors and tries his skis.
Normal behaviour,the boy stays the entire day at home teasing the cat and driving mother mad.
I believe these five examples could be sufficient to enable practically anybody to foretell what a child will do under certain circumstances.
___________________
** to raise smb = to bring smb up
*** aged thirteen or fourteen (teens–the year of one's age from 13 to 19), teenager – a boy or a girl in one's teens
**** a slingshot – рогатка
***** to raise bell (Am. colloq.) –поднять скандал
Culture
(by Bob Consedine)
One of our kids gave a blood-curdling scream in the middle of the night. Dear Mother rushed into the child's room and found him sitting up in bed.
"Can't sleep," said the young man. "It's my fairy tales."
This seemed somewhat strange to me. I thought of Mary and her Litttle Lamb* and Hickory Dickory Doc**, or whatever that rat's name was, and the other gentle tales of my early youth.
The next day, however, I got down to reading some of my little boy's fairy tales. I must have missed them as a kid. Either that or a merciful forgetfulness wafted over me. Because, ever since I started reading our kid's books, I've been sleeping with the lights on and the bedroom door locked.
Goodness Gracious!***What frightening stuff when read in retrospect!
Let's take "Hansel and Gretel" by the Grim brothers, for instance. It opens with a charming little scene between the father and mother of the kids. They are starving during famine.
"What's to become of us?" the father asks. "How are wetofeed our poor children when we have nothing for ourselves?"
"I'll tell you what, husband," answers the fond mother. "Tomorrow morning we shall take the children out quite early into the thickest part of the forest. We shall light a fire and give each of them a piece of bread. Then we shall go to our work and leave them alone. They won't be able to find their way back."
______________________
* "Little Lamb"– a sentimental nursery rhyme
** Hickory Dickory Doc – начало детского стиха
*** Goodness Gracious! – Господи,помилуй!
For some reason or other the father thinks that's an unkind thing to do, so he says, "Wild animals would soon tear them to pieces."
In the face of this weakness* the wife grows furious and snarls. "What a fool you are! Then we must all four die of hunger. You may as well plane the boards for our coffins at once."
And so they take the kids off and lose them.
Then there is that charming little tale called "The. Wolf and the Seven Kids" in a book named "The Bedtime Nursery Book."
There's an old goat, and she's got seven little kids. She goes out to get home food for her kids and says: "Look out for that bad old wolf. If you let him inside, he will eat you up – hair, skin, and all. Sometimes he disguises himself**, but you will know him by his hoarse voice and big black paws."
The wolf shows up in various disguises, which the kids see through but finally he's too smart for them and they let him in... The frightened little kids tried to hide. But the wolf found them all, except the youngest, who had hidden in the clockcase. One after another he swallows the six little kids.
Later the old lady comes home, sees the deserted house and wanders outside in her grief. There she finds a wolf snoring under a tree and "noticed that something was moving and struggling inside his body."
"She sent the youngest kid back to the house to get her scissors and a needle and thread. Then she cut open the wolfs stomach..."
Let us dismiss the utter terror contained in Little Red Riding Hood,*** because some passing woodcutters heard her scream and she was about to be consumed for her tender faith in human nature.**** The trouble is, my kid doesn't know any woodcutters. He's convinced, too, that none want to know him, or rescue him from the ominous things that take shape in his room after the twilight session with Beddy-Bye Tales.*****
Now you probably remember Hans Christian Andersen's tale "The Little Match Girl" – just the thing to read to a child who has been warned through most of his life never, never to play with matches.
This tale opens with a little girl, limping barefooted through a New Year's blizzard. She has lost her slippers and as a result her feet are red and blue. The kid can't go home because she hasn't sold her matches yet, and that means her old man will beat her black and blue.
So she begins lighting her matches and sees one vision after another. Finally she lights the whole box and sees her grandmother, who passed away in 1709.
"In the cold morning light the poor little girl sat there with rosy cheeks and a smile on her face – dead," the story reads. "Frozen to death on the last night of the year. New Year's day broke on the little body still sitting with the ends of the burnt -out matches in her hand."
I'm going to make my kid read something light and frivolous, like Poo, or "Arsenic and Old Lace."
In the meantime, if the kid lets loose another shriek in the middle of some moonless night, he's better move out. For Dear Father will be under the covers with him.
Assignments:
1. Formulate the author's views on fairy tales.
2. Tell a fairy tale thatyou like best.
_____________________
*in the face of this weakness –видя его слабость
** to disguise oneself - маскироваться
*** Little Red Riding Hood – Красная Шапочка
**** she was about to be consumed for her tender faith – ее чуть не съел волк за ее доверчивость
***** Beddy-Bye Tales = bedside fairy tales
Adolescence*
(by Bertrand Rassel from "Autobiography")
My childhood was, on the whole, happy and straightforward, and I felt affection for most of the grown-ups with whom I was brought in contact. I remember a very definite change when I reached what in modern child psychology is called "the latency period."** At this stage I began to enjoy using slang, pretending to have no feelings, and being generally "manly." I began to despise my people, chiefly because of their extreme horror of slang and their absurd notion that it was dangerous to climb trees. So many things were forbidden me that I acquired the habit of deceit, in which I persisted up to the age of twenty one. It became second
_________________________
* the time between childhood and manhood (from 13 to 21), adolescent = "teenager"
** The author refers to his early teens, the period between childhood and adolescence (latent– скрытый,невидимый).
nature to me to think that whatever 1 was doing had betterbekept to myself, and I have never quite overcome the impulse to concealment which was thus generated. I still have an impulse to hide what I am reading when anybody comes into the room, and to hold my tongue as to where I have been and what I have done. It is only by a certain effort of will* that I can overcome the impulse of concealment which was thus generated by the years during which I had to find my way among a set of foolish prohibitions.**
The years of adolescence were to me very lonely and very unhappy. Both in the life of the emotions and in the life of intellect, I was obliged to preserve an impenetrable secrecy towards my people.
Assignments:
1. Say whata boy of his early teens is like, what problems he often has.
2. Discuss what is usually referred to as a "problem child,"
3. Tell the class about your own childhood.
Clean Up Your Room
(by Art Buchwald)
You don't really feel the generation gap in this country until a son or daughter comes home from college for Christmas. Then it strikes you how out of it you really are.***
This dialogue is probably taking place all over America this week.
"Nancy, you've been home from school for three days now. Why don't you clean up your room?"
"We don't have to clean up our room at college, mother."
"That's very nice, and I'm happy you're going to such a freewheeling institution.**** But while you are in the house, your father and I would like you to clean up your room."
"What difference does it make? It's my room."
_________________________
* it is only by a certain effort of will – это вошло в привычку
** I had to find my way among a set of foolish prohibitions – мне пришлось искать выход из глупых запретов
*** Then it strikes you how out of it you really are. – Вы внезапно понимаете, насколько мало вы знаете свою собственную дочь.
**** a free-wheeling institution – заведение без всяких правил, где вы можете делать все, что хотите
"I know, dear, and it really doesn't mean that much to me. But your father has a great fear of the plague.* He said this morning if it's going to start anywhere in this country, it's going to start in your room."
"Mother, you people aren't interested in anything that's relevant. Do you realize how the major corporations are polluting our environment?"
"Your father and I are very worried about it. But right now we're more concerned with the pollution in your bedroom. You haven't made your bed since you came home."
"I never make it up at the dorm**
"Of course you don't, and I'm sure the time you save goes toward your education. But we still have these old fashioned ideas about making beds in the morning and we can't shake them. Since you're home for such a short time, why can't you do it to humour us?"
"For heaven's sake, mother, I'm grown-up now. Why do you have to treat me like a child?"
"We're not treating you like a child. But it's very hard for us to realize you're an adult when you throw all your clothes on the floor."
"I haven't thrown all my clotheson the floor. Thoseare just the clothes I wore yesterday."
"Forgive me. I exaggerated. Well,how about the dirty dishes and empty soft-drink cans*** on your desk? Are you collecting them for a science protect?"****
"Mother, you don't understand us. You people were brought up to have clean rooms. But our generation doesn't care about things like that. It's what you have in your head that counts."*****
"No one respects education more than your father and I do, particularly at the prices they're charging.****** But we can't see how living in squalor can improve your mind."
"That's because of your priorities. You should rather have me make up my bed and pick up my clothes than become a free spirit who thinks for myself."
_____________________
* your father has a great fear of the plague – папа страшно боится чумы
** dorm = dormitory– здание, где живут учащиеся колледжа
*** soft-drink cans – банки от безалкогольных напитков
**** for a science protect = for scientific research
***** It's what you have in your head that counts. – Принимаетсявовнимание то, что в вашей голове.
****** particularly at the prices they're charging – особенно если учесть плату, которую они берут
"We are not trying to stifle your free spirit. It's just that Our Blue Cross has run out, and we have no protection* in case anybody catches typhoid."
"All right I'll clean up my room if it means that much to you. But I want you to know you've ruined my vacation."
"It was a calculated risk I had to take. Oh, by the way – I know this is a terrible thing to ask of you, but would you mind help me wash the dinner dishes?"
"Wash dishes? Nobody washes dishes at school."
"Your father and I were afraid of that."
Assignments:
1. Speak of the generation gap.
2. What do you think is the ideal approach to the younger generation? (Discuss this problem in class.)
From "The Sandcastle"**
(by Iris Murdoch)
I. It was fine clear evening. Могclosed the door of the Sixth Form room and escaped down the corridor with long strides. He had just been giving a lesson to the history specialists of the Classical Sixth.*** Donald, who was in the Science Sixth,****had of course not been present. It was now two years since, to Mor's relief, his son had ceased to be his pupil.Могtaught history, and occasionally Latin, at St Bride's*****. He enjoyed teaching, and knew that he did it well. His authority and prestige in the school stood high, higher, since Demoyte's departure, than that of any other matter.Могwas well aware of this too, and it consoled him more than a little for failures in other departments of his life.
_________________________
* Говоря это, мама имеет в виду, что они больше не могут платить за услуги Голубого креста, а значит, не смогут получить бесплатного лечения в больнице.
** «Замок на песке» – роман Айрис Мердок
*** The Sixth Class is a period of preparation for A Level exams taken at the age of 18 either in humanities or in science (the choice of subjects is optional).
**** The Classical Sixth is a class with a bias in humanities, the Science Sixth– in science.
***** St Bride's – название школы
Now, as he emerged through the glass doors of Main School* into warm sunshine, a sense of satisfaction filled him, which was partly a feeling of work well done and partly the anticipation of a pleasant evening. This evening there would be the strong spicy talk of Demoyte. If he hurried, Могthought, he would be able to have one or two glasses of sherry with Demoyte.
Demoyte lived at a distance of three miles from the school. Demoyte was a scholar. For his scholarship Мог, whose talents wore speculative rather than scholarly, admired him without envy; and for his tough honest obstinate personality and his savage tongueМогrather loved him. His long period as Headmaster of St Bride's had been punctuated by violent quarrels** with members of the staff, and was still referred to as "the reign of terror."
Demoyte had not been easy to live with and he had not been easy to get rid of. Ever since Могhad come to the school, some ten years ago, he bad been Demoyte's lieutenant*** and right-hand man.
What Demoyte cared about was proficiency in work. As for morality, and such things, Demoyte took the view that if a boy could look after his Latin prose his character would look after itself.****
Very different was the view taken by the Demoyte's successor, the Reverend Giles Everard. The training of character was what nearest to Everard's heart and performance in Latin prose he regarded a secondary matter.
II. The chief buildings of St Bride's were grouped unevenly around large square of asphalt which was called the playground. Although the one thing that was strictly forbidden therein was playing. The building consisted of four tall red-brick blocks: Main School, which contained the hall, and most of the senior classrooms, and which was surrounded by the neo-Gothic tower; Library which continued the library and more classrooms, and which was built close against Main School, jutting at right angles from it; School House, opposite to Library, where the scholars ate and slept; and "Phys and Gym"* opposite the Main School, which contained the gymnasium, some laboratories, the administrative offices, and two flats for resident masters.** The St Bride's estate was extensive, it lay along the slops of a hill. There was a thick wood of oak and birch, cut by many winding paths, deep and soft with old leaves, the paradise of the younger boys. On the fringe of this wood, within sight of the library, stood the Chapel. Beyond this, hidden among the trees, were the three houses to which the boys other than the scholars*** belonged, where they lived and took their meals and, if they were senior boys, had their studies. Beyond the wood lay the squash**** courts and the swimming pool – and upon the other side, were the music rooms and the studio.
__________________________
* Main School – (зд.)the building which contained the gymnasium, some laboratories, the administrative offices, and two flats of resident masters.
** had been punctuated by violent quarrels – был отмечен бурными ссорами
*** lieutenant– (зд.)заместитель
Обыгрывается английская пословица: "Take care of theрепсеand the pounds will take care of themselves".
III. What Могdid see, at the corner of the playground near the far end of the Library, was his son Donald.
"Hello, Don," says Мог, "how goes it?"
Donald looked at him, and looked away at once. He was tall enough now to look Могin the eyes. His resemblance of his father was considerable. He had Mor's crisp dark hair, his crooked nose and lop-sided smile. His eyes were darker though, and more suspicious. His face was soft, however, still with the indeterminacy of boyhood. His mouth was shapeless and pouting, not firmly set.
Donald was long in growing up – too long, Могfelt with some sadness. He could not but grieve over his son's strange lack of maturity. At an age when he himself had been devouring books of every kind in an insatiable hunger for knowledge, Donald appeared to have no intellectual interests at all. He worked at his chemistry in a desultory fashion,*****sufficiently to keep himself out of positive disgrace; but apart from this Donald seemed to do, as far asМогcould see, nothing whatever. He spent a lot of time hanging about, talking to Carde and others, or even, what seemed toМогodder still, alone. This mode of existence was toМогextremely mysterious. Donald's reading, such as it was, seemed to consist mainly of "Three Men in a Boat," which he read over and over again, always laughing immoderately, and various books on climbing which he kept carefully concealed from his mother. During the holidays he was a tireless cinemagoer. AsМогlooked at him now, he felt a deep sadness that he was not able to express his love for his son, and that it could even be that Donald did not know at all that it existed.
_______________________
*Phys – a physics room, a room used for lessons in natural science, Gym– gymnasium, a hall used for gymnastics.
** a resident master– преподаватель, живущий при школе
*** a scholar– a holder of a scholarship
**** the squash – игра, включающая в себя элементы тенниса и гандбола
***** in a desultory fashion – бессистемно,урывками
Assignments:
1. Read passage I and
a) say what you have learnt about the teachers of St Bride's Mr Мог, Mr Demoyte and Mr Everard;
b) describe St Bride's School;
c) give a character sketch of Donald and say why his father was displeased with him.
2. Discuss in class the new facts you learnt about the educational system in England.
From "Oxford Life"
(by Dacre Balsden)
Lectures Start on Monday
Lectures start on the first Monday of term. Lecturers are sometimes in fashion; lectures as such are never in fashion.
Why take notes when you couldas well read it all in a book? The question is unanswerable.
In some subjects the lecture-list is itself carefully organized by the Faculty, so that all the necessary lectures are given and given in the terms in which undergraduates need them. In other faculties the freedom of the lecturer is not so rigidly curtailed.* Let a lecturer lecture on whatever subject he chosen. If he hopes for an audience, he will choose a subject useful to undergraduates, and he will lecture on it twice a week. If he does not care about the size of his audience and prefers to lecture on some small field of learning on which he is researching or writing a learned paper, he will lecture one hour a week. "Thursday at 11, Mr Smooth, 'Plutarch, On the Virtue of Women.' "**
Dons*** in general hate lectures as much as undergraduates. That is why they lecture so badly. Nobody has ever taught them how to lecture well. There is a Delegacy**** in Oxford for the training of schoolmasters; there is no delegacy for the training of dons.
_______________________
* to be rigidly curtailed – быть строго ограниченным
** Плутарх «О женской добродетели»
*** a don – преподаватель
**** Delegacy of Training – Управлениепо подготовке школьных Учителей
On the first Monday the lecturer has his largest audience for the term. Where there are a hundred young men and women today, there will, in eight weeks times, be no more than five or six. Where there is an audience of two today, there will perhaps be one next week and, after that, no audience at all.
A professor's lecture is sometimes like the "pas scul" of a prima ballerina. He appears; he lectures; he retires. And then after an interval, he lectures again. But the College tutor's public lecture is an interruption in a week otherwise devoted to teaching pupils in his rooms, listening to their essays and talking about them. These are "private hours" – "tutes," as the undergraduates call them, or tutorials. Sometimes a pupil comes along, sometimes in a pair, sometimes with two or three others.
Young tutors find the hour too long, old tutors find it too short. Undergraduates find it very long indeed and if there is no clock in the room, they find it even longer. When you reach a tutor's age, it is less easy to listen than to talk, and observant undergraduates quickly realize that their tutors criticize in detail the final sentences of their essays but give little evidence of having observed the rest*. There is a splendid story of the great Ingram Bywater**.
"Ah," he said, in greeting, to his pupil, "what is the subject of you essay? Expediency? Splendid. Then will you read what you have written?"
At the end, he roused himself. He said, "For the next week, will you write an essay on– er – Expediency? That is all."
Had he slept through the whole of the essay? Or was he uttering the most devastating criticism?*** The pupils never knew.
II. End of Term Collections****
Term is ending. On Friday and on Saturday the undergraduates are themselves collected. "End of Term Collections" is the
_____________________
* but give little evidence of having observed the rest – но почти не чувствуется, что они прочли все остальное
** Ingram Bywater– оксфордский ученый, специалист по средне-и новогреческому языкам
*** Or was he uttering the most devastating criticism? – Илион полностью раскритиковал его?
**** Term Collections – «семестровые сборы», принятое в Оксфордском университете шутливое название различного рода официальных и неофициальных процедур, связанных с окончанием учебного семестра
official title of the ceremony. "Handshaking" it is informally called or,more commonly, "Don Rag."*
The undergraduates receive verbally an end-of-term report. In some colleges the ceremony is private. The undergraduate is along with the Head of his college and the Head of the College has in his hands a written report from the man's tutor. And there whatever is said, is said.**
In many colleges it is a less intimate and more frightening ceremony. The Head of the College sits in the hall at the High Table, flanked by Moral Tutors.*** They are, in the eyes of the young, a body of old, old men – malicious, malevolent old sadists, laughing proudly at their own jokes, jokes always at some poor undergraduate's expense.
One by one the young men are summoned.
"MrSmith."
He walks the long way up the Hall, for the young men awaiting their summons have chosen their seats at the other end of the Hall, as far away from the High Table as they can get. He is conscious that his shoes squeak, or sound very loud on the stone floor. The inquisitors are massed on the other side of the table. On his side there is a single chair.
"Sit down, Mr Smith."
"Mr Smith, Master, has been coming to me this term. He has been working very well, as he always does. He needs, of course, to do a lot of reading in vacation."
"That is a good report, Mr Smith. Yes, pay attention to your tutor's advice – and give my very kind regards to your father. He is well, I think." (Mr Smith cannot tell the Master that he has not got a father. It happens term after term at Collections, the only time when Mr Smith and the Master are brought face to face. It is some other Smith, of course, with whom the Master regularly confuses him, a Smith who went down some terms ago.)
At about half past six in the evening, Larry emerges from Hall. He had not been certain what to expect, and he had faced the ordeal with some anxiety.
______________________
* Rag – розыгрыш, который обычно устраивают студенты старших курсов новичкам (в Оксфорде и Кембридже носит безобидный характер).
** And there whatever is said, is said. – И что уж там говорится, то и говорится.
*** Moral Tutor – куратор, который отвечает за поведение студентов, он же дает характеристику студентам, желающим поступить на Работу в период каникул
His tutor said, "Mr Minthauser is still in the process of setting down, Master. He isn't quite used to our methods yet. He is beginning to learn that we don't regard length in an essay as any particular virtue – indeed that we rather mistrust people who can't express themselves briefly. But of course it's all new to him and he is tackling it in quite the right spirit."*
And the master has said, "How wouldyou report on yourself, Mr Minthauser?"
"I guess I'll make out in the end, but somebody's going to have to do some work on me first."
"Good," the master says.
III. Oxford Accent
Last October freshmen have gone down.** When they return in October, they will be second year men and women. Academically, they will be approaching middle age. How much of a stamp Oxford put on them already?*** Have they started to acquire an Oxford accent?
The Oxford accent exists, but it defies definition.**** It is not, as the French think, the kind of English which is spoken within a twenty mile radius of the city. Indeed, it is not an accent at all, but a manner of speaking. In particular it is a manner of pausing in your speech, of pausing not at the end of sentences, where you might be interrupted, but in the middle of sentences. Nobody, it is to be hoped, will be so rude to interrupt you when you are in the middle of a sentence. So pause there, to decide what your next sentence is going to be. Then, having decided, move quickly forward to it without a moment's pause at the full stop. Yes, jumping your full stops***** – that is the Oxford accent. Do it well, and you will be able to talk forever. Nobody will have the chance of breaking in and stealing the conversation from you.******
The Oxford accent, so called, is also a matter of redefining the other person's statement on your own terms.******* Wait for him to say whatever he has to say. Then start yourself: "What you really mean is..." Nothing could be ruder.
And for Americans in general it is a matter of employing, all unconsciously, a new vocabulary, of doing by instinct what on your arrival, you were shocked to hear other Americans doing.
Assignments:
1. Read extract number I and speak on:
a) the way the author presents the work of the lecturers in Oxford;
b) the tutorial system of education in British Universities.
2. Say what the "Term Collections" procedure is organized for.
3. Discuss the problem of an Oxford accent with your groupmates.
________________________
* and he is tackling it in quite the right spirit – и он делает это верно
** to go down – уйти из института
*** to put a stamp on smb – наложить на кого-л. отпечаток
**** to defy definition – не иметь определения
***** jumping your full stops – пропуски точек
****** Nobody will have the chance of breaking in and stealing the conversation from you. – Никто не сможет прервать вас или перехватить у вас инициативу в разговоре.
******* is also a matter of redefining the other person's statement on your own terms–это так же истолкование чьего-то утверждения по-своему
A Reporter's Account
(by Daniel 'Lang)